Entry: Hesitant Saturday, May 17, 2014

Yesterday after a long work day while not feeling well, I was convinced that I needed to run a few errands before going home. I really wanted to go to sleep. But anyway. After getting home I asked for something and while I thought it was a simple request it proved difficult anyway. And the old me was hesitant to continue talking because I was so shocked about the confusion. However, I told myself I needed to speak up, at least say a little something to make it more clear. Just as I started to say something TA DA they figured it out!! I wonder if I had waited the extra 2 seconds if it would have still been figured out, or if I had said something sooner would there have been less stress. Tho I don't really know if I caused much stress. Maybe it was just me. But why would something so small stress me? Foolishness.

I think I did well this morning though. I was able to share what was on my mind about my feelings, and what I wanted. No, I didn't exactly spit it out and say it as directly as possible, but I did make it known as best as I could for the time being. Shockingly I got what I wanted, and didn't feel as bad or as annoyed about it as I thought I would (just because I still think I shouldn't have to ask for everything - side note: now accepting applications for hot looking mind readers :p). I thought asking for things or having to say what I want all the time would be less fulfilling. It wasn't too bad. And in return I felt better about doing something nice.


Other news of the day and things on my mind that have nothing to do with the title:

- I'm starving
- I'm thrilled my apple cake came out perfectly
- I really hope Donovan behaves as much as he can, and enjoys his morning with his other godmother
- I wish I could buckle down and get my office cleaned up so I can paint the shirts folks want
- In the last month while I've been reclaiming my single status I did something shocking! I cleaned the toilet!!! It's been a goooooooooooooood while since I've cleaned a toilet. LOL. Yup.
- I feel bad that I often want Donovan to just STOP TALKING when it's been just the two of us all day long. OMG that boy can talk!!! Incessantly!! And sometimes I just don't feel like answering.
- It would be nice if my bathroom were finished but surprisingly I'm not upset that it isn't. I'm more upset that I got a sink for my birthday.
- I need to shave
- There's laundry at the foot of my bed .... again. Ugh.
- I wish I cared about my job. I know I'm half assing it til the year ends.
- Seeing celebrities without their makeup makes me cringe. So deceptive. Meanies. (my thought based on seeing Erica Jean without makeup on Iyanla Fix My Life, when she's already not cute even with it on)
- Also wondering why the hell Iyanla's outfits are all skin tight!
- I know I was told that tomorrow morning she wants to take full advantage of the alone time but ... 1. I don't know what that means. 2. I wasn't asked about what I'd like to do with the time. WIth any luck I'll get some more things accomplished. *fingers crossed*

Mood: umm .. uncertain
Movie: The Vow
Song: Pink - So What
Color: fresh snow white


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